I know you miss the way I saw you.

Sat, 19 Jul 2008 07:10:08 GMT

It's true.

I'll be around, I'm not running or hiding.

I'm a little scared, ashamed. And very sorry. But I know each of you deserves your chance to confront me, so I'm here.

I'll stay on "surrealitybites" for a week or so, then IRL forces me busy. After that, try "surrealitybites@gmail.com"

Mon, 14 Apr 2008 13:30:26 GMT

This is essentially closed for the forseeable future. Expect no further entries.

Mon, 14 Apr 2008 12:57:29 GMT

"Some days it ain't sunny, but it ain't so hard."

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 23:08:09 GMT

I'm glad the Chinese will host the Olympic games. This way, the whole world (and the Chinese people most importantly) will see just how far into the "Special Olympics" category their country's athletes are. I'm be shocked if they win a single silver medal.

Thu, 10 Apr 2008 13:08:46 GMT

"There's no good answer, to no new questions. Just another personal disaster. There's nowhere to go but down. Until I fall away I won't keep you waiting long."

Tue, 01 Apr 2008 23:21:37 GMT

A much older friend of mine went somewhere with me recently, and I played my music as I always do. So today they asked me out of the blue if I could make a Jack Johnson CD and a mix CD. I'm so geeked I'm beside myself. And I have no idea what to put on the mix CD.

"I want to touch you. You're just made for love." - Goldfrapp, "Ooh La La."

Tue, 01 Apr 2008 17:30:15 GMT

Don't April fools me. If you do, realize that you do so at your own risk. I'll probably laugh. Or I may cut your head off. Either way, I'll try to smile. And that's the important thing. To smile.

Miss Samantha already did it.

She said, "I'm pregnant from before you."

I said, "Well it sure as shit wasn't because of me. That's big news. How do you feel about it?"

She said, "Pretty good. 'Cause it's just an April Fools!"

And I said, because I knew it would come to pass, "You, my love...are a fuck."

That was my morning. How was yours?

Mon, 31 Mar 2008 21:19:49 GMT

Sometimes I really worry about how self-absorbed my writing actually is.

At the moment, I've determined to write something. Small story. Long story. Just some sort of story. Now I'm trying to drum up ideas. Not only ideas, but ideas that I believe will customize themselves to my personal amusement. Ideas that will be easy to write.

In the mean time I'm spending way too much time on this post for Sansa. I need to get on with it.

This lyric has really stuck with me today. Love the song, but love the lyric even more. Especially the way the person sings it:

"Sometimes solutions arn't so simple. Sometimes goodbye's the only way." - Linkin Park, "Shadow Of The Day."

Sun, 30 Mar 2008 22:41:01 GMT

I usually don't post them so close together. But Miss Sam was going through my music, and started to pick a band and ask me where they were from:

"Arctic Monkeys?"
"UK."
"Bloc Party?"
"UK."
"Stereophonics?"
"UK."

And so-on, and so-on until:

"You're just a little UK indie geek, arn't you?"

Come to think of it...yeah. Yeah I am.

So, she wanted a playlist. That means a playlist for everyone. Yaaaaaay! Heh.

UK indie-ism;

Arctic Monkeys, "Teddy Picker."
Apartment, "Fall Into Place."
Bloc Party, "Helicopter."
Stereophonics, "Maybe Tomorrow."
Stereophonics, "Dakota."
The Music, "Breakin'."
Goldfrapp, "Ooh LaLa."
Goldfrapp, "A&E."
Razorlight, "Goldentouch."
Maximo Park, "Our Velocity."
Maximo Park, "Girls Who Play Guitar."
The Kooks, "Seaside."
The Futureheads, "Meantime."
Embrace, "Ashes."
The Subways, "Rock & Roll Queen."
22-20's, "Shoot Your Gun."
Belle & Sebastian, "If She Wants Me."
The Kaiser Chiefs, "Ruby."

Sun, 30 Mar 2008 21:03:55 GMT

"Flicking through a little book of sex tips. Remember when the boys were all electric? Now when she tells she's gonna get it, I'm guessing that she'd rather just forget it." - Arctic Monkeys, "Fluorescent Adolescent."

"My spirt exerts itself in hopelessness and pain only, dear Liar."

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 22:10:12 GMT

Kings of Leon, "Knocked Up."
Matthew Ryan, "Irrelevant."
Gin Blossoms, "Until I Fall Away."
Snow Patrol, "Open Your Eyes."
The Eels, "Last Time We Spoke."
The New Radicals, "I Don't Want To Die Anymore."
The Editors, "An End Has A Start."
Jack Johnson, "Go On."
The Used, "The Taste Of Ink."
The Killers, "Shadowplay."
Our Lady Peace, "4am."
Counting Crows, "Perfect Blue Buildings."
Vertical Horizon, "Finding Me."
Bob Dylan, "Don't Think Twice, It's Alright."
Tears For Fears, "Me And My Big Ideas."

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 20:28:29 GMT

"You came on your own--and that's how you'll leave."

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 04:26:19 GMT

Massive chest/heart pains. Almost went to the ER. So taking the next few days easy.

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 18:46:07 GMT

He knew he should leave. He knew this could only turn bad. There was a whispered lust in the air around him coming from the directionless voice. The voice of a horny angel. In his mind he forbade passion from the air, and his body. It wasn't as casual or easy as that, he knew. None of it had been easy. None of it would ever be easy with her around. She made his world spin. She made his mind turn and contort onto subjects and thoughts that he hadn't been thinking for so long that he was no longer he was a "real" man.

These things and more, he felt in her presence. His reported listed her hair as blonde, her eyes as green. She was six feet on the dot. Not altogether strange for a woman, but unusual. The strange part was that her hair wasn't blonde. It was gold. But he knew he couldn't put down on the report that her hair was like threads and curls of pure gold. Shimmering and shadowing depending on the light around her. There was no place in his official report that her skin did the exact same thing. Or that while her eyes were green, they were a color of green that he had never even seen before. Not to mention they would light a dark room.

When he took the woman into the West Gotham station house, he wasn't alone. Gangbangers, drug dealers, prostitutes, victims, men and women in uniform--everyone and everything stopped the moment he walked in with this woman. The desk Sergeant stared. The female officer assisting him with the booking, Jensen, even stared. She was only in the force about a year. She was tight lighted and straight laced. A good cop. He had never heard anything of Jensen swinging either way of that particular fence.

Worst of all, the woman was out of it. Gone. She looked like she was on some kind of drug that just fried every perception and sensation that fed her body vital--and practical--information. She had yet to say anything but muffled whispers that were just beyond his hearing. Whispered of a voice that sounded so good he strained harder than he ever should have to hear them, to pick up any word or find the reason for any of the small sighs. He never picked up anything, just more muffled whispers.

``Detective.`` Captain Jorge Madina, Gotham City Police Department. ``This is her?``

Madina couldn't believe it. The way he stressed "this is her?" The way he, a man married for over twenty years, stared at her. Madina had enough of his own head to just turn away from her, and put his eyes squarely on the newly minted Detective. It was his first week with the gold shield, when he got the call. It was an assistance call to all hands. He expected the Joker. He expected Two-Face. When he reached the alley behind the old Gotham Theater House, he saw five uniformed cops on the ground. And saw her dispatch the sixth. Even in her barely conscious state, it was child's play for her to deal with the uniformed cop. There had been shots. None of them hit. How and why was something he couldn't believe his own eyes about. Then the gun was on the ground. A heartbeat later, the cop was on the ground too. But the cop wasn't bleeding. That's when it hit him: She hadn't killed any of the cops.

Those burning green eyes hit him, and he stopped. His gun was drawn, and raised to her. She smiled at him. And then she fell to the ground. He almost had a heart attack. Instead he very slowly, and very carefully, approached her. Cuffed her. And then walked her to his car.

When you beat up cops, the cops beat you up. That was the old school rule of Gotham policing. Madina wasn't an entirely old school cop. There were traces of it in the salt and peppered haired Mexican-American man, lines of age along his dark face. But in reality, Madina was one of Commissioner Gordon's boys. He liked their kind of cop more than he liked his old Captain's cop.

``You saw it?``

``The end of it.`` He spoke, even as he looked at her. Her eyes were closed, her head tilted down. Hair hiding most of her face from his angle. Jensen's fingerprinting was done unusually. He noticed the way she took the woman's hand that the motions and the touches weren't cop touches. ``She put them down like she was fighting children, Captain. She treated gunfire like water from a water gun. It was silly, and something to casually side-step. Easy to avoid. For the life of me, I can't explain how she did it.``

``She did all of that like THAT?`` The woman looked so out of it, she could barely stay seated upright. Her head swayed, slightly. Along with the rest of her.

Incredibly, he found himself nodded in response. ``Yeah. Like THAT.``

``Metahuman?``

He couldn't say. The term was still new to Detective Milo Ramsey. There were a few memos about it. Then training. And more training. Commissioner Gordon had made "meta-humans" a real focus of the Force. From what very little Milo heard from whispers of guys on the force who knew more about that sorta thing, Gordon was going rounds with the Mayor's office on establishing some sort of new meta-human taskforce. Then Milo found himself absorbing the way Jensen treated the woman. Felt the instant emotional response that occurred within him as he watched Jensen with the woman. Jealousy. Milo was never the jealous type. It really did feel like he was losing his mind around her.

``She has to be.`` The way he said it, he wasn't entirely sure he was speaking to Captain Madina.

Madina nodded. His face hardening, his eyes narrowing as he looked at the woman again. He was bracing himself for the impact of her image. It was then that Milo looked to the side, and noticed that everything was still stopped. Everyone was still looking. Madina had noticed too. ``Let's get her down in the basement, then. Jensen, tell Sergeant I want the basement ready and cleared if there's anyone down there.``

There wouldn't be. The last time anyone had been held in the basement, it was the Joker himself. Milo almost moved to stop him when he saw Madina start towards the woman. But then reality reminded him of the vastness between Detective and Captain.

``Who are you? What's your name? WHAT are you?``

Muffled whispers filled the air. Bouncing off walls and eardrums, seducing and moving everything that heard. The effected focus, the start of the loss of his control only pushed Madina to anger. In his anger he reached down, took the woman by the chin, and raised her head so those mystical green eyes met his own. Milo didn't notice the way Madina's body froze, and then began to tremble. He didn't notice the noise Madina made. He only saw her, and only heard the miracle that was actual words from the woman.

``...Iceni...Dillon.``

Madina had tears in his eyes when his body snapped away from her like the woman had shocked him. He turned his back on all of them, his hands ringing and rubbing together. Trying to work the feeling back into them. His voice was changed, different. But still hard.

``Get her down in the basement. Now. And call Commissioner Gordon. Get him down here.``

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 17:28:18 GMT

"It's been so long since I've seen her around here
I can't remember if she's real
Summer days spent walking around
And up all night yeah
Trying to remember if she's real

Well I don't think that I'll be back before nine
It might be nine, West Coast time
Well I got some friends in LA
Telling me to head out their way
'Cause they know I'm in love with the sun."

Sat, 22 Mar 2008 10:04:15 GMT

I just got off the phone with one of the oddest friends I have. At one point we moved into "what Hollywood star would fit each famed porn role (the cheerleader, schoolgirl, housewife, etc.) the best." I'm still not sure how we did overall, but I think we got the cheerleader one down the best: Hayden Panettiere.

And it's possible we got "aggressive lesbian" down: Angelina Jolie. Although early Jolie works best.

I can't begin to explain why, but I feel the need to see this through.

Saw 10,000 BC. Seemed like a made for TV movie. Writers and producers sucked. Directer seemed to do what he could. Though friend and I agreed on this sentiment: Where the hell has Camilla Belle been all my life?

And why doesn't she have a better online picture spread than she does?

I have to go with Texas for my Tourny pick. It just seems like some second tier team is gonna get hot all the way to cutting down nets. So why not Texas?

Really having fun with this Donovan storyline. Feel free to ask me about it.

Also, one of the first times in a while I was all: "Wow. Iceni's hot."

Fri, 14 Mar 2008 16:09:21 GMT

The last time producer Charles Roven saw Ledger was when he showed the actor the very footage that was screened at ShoWest.

Fans have been buzzing over the anarchic style Ledger brings to the role in the movie's trailer, but the actor himself was utterly taken by what he saw of himself on screen, Roven said.

"He was just blown away by his own performance," Roven said. "He said, 'Can I see it again?' So he was really, really thrilled."

...just...dammit.

This is starting to rank right up there with the loss of Brandon Lee to me.

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 14:00:01 GMT

So. Sam woke me up at midnight. Half asleep, I opened the door. She laughed at me, and led me back to bed. Then stayed the night with me. First time she's ever had me sleep on her. Poor girl.

Mon, 10 Mar 2008 03:58:11 GMT

Went to Vegas this weekend. With Sam.

I suppose that's all I should be saying, for now.*Grin.*

Instead of telling this individually to people, I'll say it here: After this weekend, I'm officially off the market I wasn't on to begin with. I'm very happy at the moment, thanks! <3

Mon, 10 Mar 2008 02:49:15 GMT

"You lied to me."

"When? When did I ever lie to you?"

"When you said forever."

Fri, 07 Mar 2008 22:55:12 GMT

My boy LOVES Sam. I quote:

"She's cool! She plays videogames way better than you!"

Man, did I laugh.

Sam and I are getting close. I would've never thought I'd get back into things with a girl. There's a lot of strangeness there. It's like two teenage girls kissing for the first time. So weird, but exciting.

Relationship may be coming down the line very soon.

Fri, 07 Mar 2008 13:28:47 GMT

Headline.

"General: Al-Qaida may be plotting to attack the U.S."

...really? Shocked, I tell you.

I couldn't believe such a stupid headline was true. Just bad writing. So I clicked the story link. It got better:

"Al-Qaida terrorists may be plotting more urgently to attack the United States..."

Because, you know, homocidal religious fanatics weren't urgent before.

So stupid.

To make things worse, said General looks like a hopeless nerd in a uniform. I'm sure men and women in uniform are just excited to follow this guy.

But don't worry. This was an AIR FORCE General talking. And the Air Force is pretty freakin' useless. So it's not like anybody's following this guy anywhere. Except maybe to the copy machine.

Our poor military.

Thu, 06 Mar 2008 14:41:30 GMT

Ms. Dillon was rather entertaining last night. She hijacked no less than two posts.

Tue, 04 Mar 2008 21:33:03 GMT

"Is it still me that makes you sweat? Am I who you think about in bed? When the lights are dim and your hands are shaking as you're sliding off your dress, then think of what you did. And how I hope to God he was worth it.

When the lights are dim and your heart is racing as your fingers touch his skin. I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck than any boy you'll ever meet. Sweetie you had me."

Tue, 04 Mar 2008 16:36:23 GMT

Some people may have permenantly disenchanted themselves with me. I'm just tired of dealing with the same stuff with them. They're just...mean, and they either don't know it or feel justified in doing it. Either way, I'm about done with that. They can make any next moves.

I'm buying a new guitar today. Go me! Accoustic.

I totally forgot how old I am just now. I seriously had to do the math. This is after I forgot what day it was. I'm losing my mind. It's officialness and all that.

Today I mourn the loss of a childhood friend. Be nice today.